Diving through the Waves

After work yesterday Jamie and I went down to Second Beach in Middletown and went swimming in the waves. The waves were as big as I had ever seen them there because it was a full moon and the tide was coming in, a great combination! Yesterday was the first day that I had been swimming this summer and Jamie was excited I was finally joining him. The water was a terrific 70 degrees and beautiful.

It’s always hard when you are first walking out to swim in the ocean. No matter what the temperature is, when the water first touches any part of your body it feels cold. The waves always come and splash the dry parts before you are ready for it and then just as quickly move on. Once your dry belly is splashed you walk out further and stop when the newly splashed parts are now under water because it doesn’t feel as cold any more. You then stand and wait, trying to hop over the smaller waves. Then another wave sneaks up and splashes you higher up on your belly. This continues until you are far enough out you decide to just dive through the next wave.

Through life there are always events that sneak up on us, ones that you were sure you weren’t ready for but some how came out of and ended up stronger for it. A childhood challenge makes us stronger for the challenges we face as teenagers. From these teen years we learn so much and take our lessons learned with us when facing our adult life. Each feels too hard at the time, but we grow stronger as we continue through life, sometimes unaware of the strength that has grown.

There have been times in my life when the waves chill has lasted longer then maybe it should have. I admit to standing and waiting, feeling over whelmed by the smallest of waves, just not ready to continue on. Through support from others and a strength I never knew was there I was able to move further and I am so glad that I did.

Jamie and I had a great time swimming. The waves were splashing and crashing, and I got tossed around from them. Jamie held my hand and kept me from falling over more then a few times. As we were walking out and the waves got stronger Jamie stood in front of me to help block them. We would swim out over, dive through and ride the waves in. We would swim out till we could barely touch the ground and then swim in, over and over. We tried swimming parallel to the shore but it didn’t work out well. We wouldn’t be watching and then a big wave would crash over us and we’d get water in our mouths. We had a great time and laughed the whole time, the scenery and water were picture perfect, it was great moments to remember.

This morning was Jamie’s doctor appointment with his cardiologist at Children’s Hospital in Boston. Neither of us slept to well. I have the hardest time sitting in the waiting room even though I have been before. Most of the other patients are babies and toddlers, and there are small tables and toys for them to play with. All of the kids seem happy, either playing with the toys or sitting with their parents listening to a book be read. The parents, when not distracted by their happy kid, have a look of dread and concern on their face. This look cuts deep in me, I feel very empathetic towards them and also I see my own feelings being reflected.

One couple held their son on their lap; he didn’t look older then 6 months to me. They both were doting on him and doing things to make him smile. The mother had clearly been crying and looked close to it still. There was a young girl playing with one of those wire frame toys that you slide colorfully shaped blocks along. Her father paced and organized magazines while watching her as her mother sat as still as I have ever seen anyone who has a child sit watching their daughter with an unblinking eye.

The wave was about to crash over me as I was sitting in the waiting room. So I read Jamie a book that was sitting near me, it was in Spanish and about a llama. It made us both laugh because we don’t really know what we were reading. He got tested, weighed and measured and everything is looking great!! The good Dr. Walsh says he is still going strong and his pace maker could possibly last 2 more years before we need to change the batteries; terrific news. He also said that his heart hasn’t changed and predicted him to live to 110 or 111!! Thank you Dr. Walsh for your work and kind words, you are an amazing person.

The water’s not as cold; we’ll take a few more steps out. Together.